Floating Along On A Big Blue Whale Under The Sea.

Have you ever felt like you’re watching the world through a sheet of glass, maybe even the beer goggles schools use to teach us how to be drunk? And you, you’re watching yourself from the eyes of others – it’s a cliché for a reason. It’s when you’re sad. No, excited. Wait…nervous? I don’t know.

I’d say it’s worry, but what’s the point in worrying? Life goes on with or without you, no matter your so called ‘mental state’. You get no time to consider what the bloody hell is going on. It makes me giggle really, everybody is such a drama queen when it comes to change! Some panic and become a ball of destruction, a bit like the impression my Dad does of me walking into the house after they’ve been sorting it for days (sorry). But that’s not my ‘coping mechanism’, that’s just me being me – I like to call it being creative.

Most are guilty of pulling all of the attention, sympathy, excitement and sadness out of the people around them. Or they think they are, but unless that person actually cares, they’re really thinking ‘face look bovvered?’.

Change is just damn weird. Just plaster a cheesy grin on those chubby cheeks, and eat a chocolate hobnob.

How To Make A ‘Modest’ Crop Top

I’m rubbish at sewing, and most things society think a woman should be good at (including tiding anything). Disregarding this, I took my hand to recreating a top I bought from a charity shop for £2. It was like a doctor’s shirt to start with, so I decided to make it a little more ‘wearable’ because I loved the pattern.  The most difficult thing about this is threading a needle with fat fingers.

Original Top

1. Decide the length of your top, any length from visible stomach wobble to visible knobbly knees. Draw a dash with tailors chalk where you want to chop. Lay the top on a flat surface and use a ruler to draw a line across the top, one inch below the desired length. Using fabric scissors, cut along the line – it doesn’t matter if it’s messy.

Cut Top

2. Turn the top inside out and fold up the bottom to the desired length (I’m saying that too often). If the fabric is thin, fold the excess fabric in again towards the crease. Go along pinning the fabric in place as you do this. Pinned Top

3. Iron over the hem – the fold we just created, so that the crease is more defined and easier to work with. Here, you can either tack with big stitches to hold the hem in place, or keep the pins in if you don’t mind being pricked every two seconds.

4. Thread the needle and using simple stitches, go around the hem to sew it in place. To begin, tie a knot in one end of the thread and chop the excess as close to the knot as possible. Insert the needle while the top is still inside out, so the knot will not be visible.

5. I used white thread, but use which ever colour compliments the top most. As you will be able to see the stitching using this method, ensure it is neat unless you are going for a messy look. I like the stitch showing, because I find it adds interest to the top.

Final TopMe in Top

City Life

  My knowledge of City life extends to walking in the right side of the pavement to avoid being trampled on by an army of suits. Once I confused a bus driver so much, he took me to the other side of the road. On the curb, arms are flung in front of me in an attempt to protect me from oncoming cars – often whizzing by unnoticed to my bewildered eyes. I planned on living my life in the seclusion of fields and country lanes, in order to lower the probability of my premature death. 

Planning is utter codswollup. We’re moving to a city. 

A new house. A new college. A new set of friends – except a few, obviously. A new school for most my age is enough to worry about, so why am I not insane? Either it hasn’t sunk in to my mess of a mind that this is really happening, or maybe I’m actually just okay with the premise. What if it suddenly slaps me across the face, and I turn into a lunatic with pink streaks in my hair? I don’t know why I’d get pink streaks. My stomach swirls with a mixture of emotions when I think of it – upset, worry, panic. Then excitement, curiosity and intrigue.

It was looking forward to a new college along side my best friend and boyfriend, I feel a little left out they’re going without me. The college was impressive, but strangely even when I went to an open day it didn’t feel like I was going to go there. I could of walked to this college, and sat on the river bank with my boyfriend or best friend during frees. Maybe I’m a daydreamer, I’m sure we’d be too busy to sit around. Alex has already got a load of ‘mates’ (reckons himself a tough guy) at college, so he’d be with them often. As for my best friend, surely it’s better to make a few new friends too and widen your horizons? 

The new college I will have to cycle to – lets see how long I live. My bags will go in a basket on the front of my bike, as I peddle up a steep hill, sweat dripping from my forehead. I’ve already been given mountains of summer work, to which I’m building up the courage to start (anyday now, I will find motivation). Not to brag, but there’s two sushi shops down the road, and a billion coffee shops. I can imagine myself working quietly in the corner of a coffee shop with a cappuccino and a masterpiece forming in front of me – unfortunately, I don’t like coffee and I hate going places alone. 

I can’t wait to redesign my own bedroom, I’m thinking bohemian style with a canopy and a multicoloured wall mural – in the perfect, brilliant white, brand spanking new house. My parents may be the reason for my premature death if I were to do this. Although it will be my hidyhole from the busy city, so I plan to make it very cosy. I’d like big cushions, thick rugs, artwork hanging on the walls and a desk to do some work in peace – also a super fast internet connection for flawless FaceTime with Alex. 

I’ll need a job. I want to visit Alex, and he will hopefully want to visit me. It’s a three-ish hour train journey, where I plan to get all my homework done. I mean, I’m still hedging my bets on the chances of me getting car… hint, hint. I’d like a job in a little vintage shop, telling everyone they look ‘gorgeous darling’. But I suppose I can’t be picky, employers aren’t exactly begging for non-experienced sixteen years olds. The problem is, I’m a college during the day, will often be coming home at weekends and I’m terrified to walk anywhere at night alone. Although I’m sure my ugly mug emerging from the dark will protect me from potential threats at night.

I guess this may be pretty boring unless you’re going through the same thing as me, so I’d like to say I’m sorry – but I’m not. Sometimes it’s nice to write things down, and also get other’s opinions. I’m not worried, I’m fine no matter where I am. Aslong as I have the people around me that make things not quite so serious. 

Queen of Puddings

Queen Of PuddingsOkay, the name of this pudding really is ‘Queen of Puddings’. This beats even the Queen of Hearts jam tarts. It’s a kind of spongy, jammy, meringue-y thing.

Now I’m going to tell you the typical ‘it’s been passed down generations’ story. So my family and I would sit and eat a meal with my Granny and Grandpa, who are very intelligent people, every few months or so. They’d pull out their newspapers and have intellectual conversation topics, I could usually understand one or two words in each sentence spoken. You had to pick your moment, as in the right breath of air they take, to ask the question. ‘What’s for pudding?’. I only ever wished for Queen of Puddings to be said, after their laughter at my innocent question.


100ml of milk – anything but skimmed

25g of butter

250g of caster sugar

3 free range eggs

3 slices of bread – not nutty

5 tbsp strawberry jam

Method (in my madness):

1. Preheat the oven to 170C/Gas 3 and grease a small shallow ovenproof dish with butter.

2. Warm the milk (don’t let it boil), then add 50g of sugar and 25g of butter, keeping it on the heat until it dissolves.

3. Separate the eggs, and keeping the egg white in a separate bowl, whisk the yolks. Slowly pour the egg yolk into the warm milk, whisking as you do.

4. Rip the bread into little pieces and layer them at the bottom of the shallow dish. Pour over the custard and leave to stand for 15 minutes – or until you get bored.

5. Place the dish in a roasting tin and fill the roasting tin halfway with hot water – bit confusing, if you need clarification just ask. Put in the oven for 25-30 minutes or until custard is set.

6. Some recipes say to make the jam, but it’s much easier to use a jar. Using the back of a tablespoon spread the dollops of jam on top of the set custard, if it mixes a bit it doesn’t matter. Continue to dollop until you have the desired layer of jam.

7. Using a electric whisk (especially if you’re lazy), whisk the egg whites until it forms stiff peaks when you lift the whisk out. Add the rest of the sugar in small amounts continuing to whisk as you do. There’s a lot of whisking in this recipe.

8. (Dolloping again) Dollop the egg white of top on the jam with another tablespoon spreading as you go, being careful not to move it about too much.

9. Put in the oven again for 25-30 minutes, being careful not to burn yourself – not that I did of course.

10. Eat to your own delight. Or you could share it, but who in their right mind would do that?

How To Draw Your Own Logo

You see those blogs with really cool logo’s, right? And you always wonder whether they REALLY did it themselves. Well, often or not they don’t. However, you can make a logo look almost as cool all by yourself; without all the techno geeks and enormous Macs. Why don’t you just draw it with old fashioned pen and paper?

1. Research

I’ve got to say, Pinterest is pretty cool for things like this. I made a board when I was looking for inspiration for my design, this is the link: https://www.pinterest.com/sofiajmoore/illustrations/, feel free to have a look! Find a style or type of design which you think will suit your purpose and continue to research within this area. There is no such thing as too much research.

2. Sketch out a few designs

They don’t have to be perfect, and use your research. Even if you don’t like the design you had in your head once you’ve sketched it out, it doesn’t matter. Don’t focus on one design too much at this stage, have a look at lots of different ones. I personally like to do these in fine liner and watercolour, as I find it makes even a rubbish design look a little better.

Photo designDesign Sheet

3. Choose a design you like the most

Look at the one which will enhance your title, and also the most aesthetically pleasing. Some of the best logos are often the simplest, so keep that in mind. Once you’ve found a design you’d like to work on, continue to sketch out different compositions or work with different colours.


4. Draw your design on a large scale

So you know the design you’d like, and it looks pretty cool if you say so yourself. Draw it on a larger scale so when you either take a photo of it, or scan it in, it won’t be pixelated. It will also allow you to incorporate any detail in a neater way. Be sure to remove the background, which is easy enough to do on Word, and upload it on to whichever platform you want it for. Easy peasy lemon squeezy!


Joining The Gym

I always thought ‘hitting the gym’ was for bouncy blonde women with heaps of self-confidence. The thought of my body wobbling in all directions as I run on a running machine in front of a so called ‘audience’ never did appeal to me – no idea why. But the other day I had a revelation, the more I go to the gym, the more I can eat. Yes, my sushi obsession will finally be accepted by ‘my people’.

I’m not going to lie to you, I have genuinely no idea what you do in a gym. The extent of my machinery knowledge, is the treadmill. Will there be people doing things without machinery? Like squats in the middle of the gym, because I think I’d find this awkward. What do you wear to the gym? I’m not an ‘up-the-bum shorts’ kind of girl and I’m pretty sure there aren’t sports leggings short enough for my legs, they usually fill up half the space in my trainers.

Oh well, I guess flashing my membership card to the front desk will be pretty James Bond-y.

The animal I most resemble in the gym.

5 Things To Do By The Seaside

StonesSo I’m not talking about halcyon, tropical beaches here; I’m thinking more of a windswept hair, lobster face, white horses, British beach. Luckily, I happened to spend the weekend on one of these  alluring beaches with my boyfriend. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed more in my life, I felt like the Joker with my mouth stuck in a constant ‘why so serious’ smile.

1. Buy a dinghy

I’m not messing with you, I promise; go and buy a dinghy. There was a mutual nod of agreement as we saw a little dinghy resting against a tackle shop window. It was our destiny to buy this ‘ship’. Do I think buying this £35 vessel was worth it? Considering we used it for three days and then returned it due a ‘fault in the seam’, you bet it was! We rowed round the tranquil harbour with a pink sunset backdrop to our hearts content. I say ‘we’… but Alex rowed, I sat with my legs wrapped in a blanket admiring the view.

2. Ride the waves

On a bodyboard that is, especially if you like to pretend you surf. What’s that? You don’t like going in the sea because it’s cold? Put a wetsuit on and man up. Oh, and now you say you can’t body board? Alex was ‘catchin waves’ for half an hour and now considers himself a professional. The feeling of lying on a board, avoiding the jellyfish and floating in the sea waiting for the right wave is undeniably going to make you smile.

3. Go crabbing

There’s a delightful habour wall near our beach, so obviously our first thought was ‘crabbing’. We set up a net dangling off the edge and sat in wait for our creepy crabs, which by the way both of us were unwilling to actually touch. A cosy jumper and few passerbys later and we had three of the crustaceans. There’s something very satisfying about collecting crabs, perhaps it’s the people walking by feeling obliged to admire them in the bucket.

4. Dig holes 

Yes, the kind of holes your brother dug in the sand when you were little. There’s not much you can say about this, except it’s very funny. Lie on your stomach and dig like a dog until you can see Australia… or until you hit a rock.It’s kind of like the opposite of building a sandcastle, those things are just too mainstream.

                Yes, he looks like a meerkat.

5. Eat chips

Lots of them. They give you long lasting energy (I like to think) and could technically be classed as a vegetable. I think we ate seven different bags or boxes of chips over the weekend each, and I don’t regret any one of them. There’s nothing like scoffing chips while sitting on a painful rock, after a morning in the sea. My personal favourite is chips with curry sauce, a very British experience all in all.

The Truth About GCSEs.

The Truth About GCSEsExams, we’ve all done them. Probably.

You sit at a wobbly wooden desk with ‘i hate exams’ scratched into it (thanks for the moral support), and an expressionless invigilator making awkward eye contact every few minutes. You avoid moving your chair, so as not to sound like you’re ‘breaking wind’ and god forbid if you drop your pencil. After controlling all of this, the exam seems to go by pretty quickly.

I’ve just completed my GCSEs, and I honestly have no idea how they went – so don’t even bother to ask. The nine subjects I took could all be anywhere between an A* and a D. However, I think I learnt a thing or two.

1. It is possible to revise everything the day before.  We all do it, and we all pretend not to. Okay, maybe you started the topic weeks ago and got through the first few pages, then realise how much you really have to do ‘that other subject‘! You get to the day before and are in deep doo doo. GET UP EARLY. You start at 7 o’clock and go through to even just 12 o’clock and you’ve done 5 hours! It may not be what you planned…but as tesco says, ‘every little helps’. Just finding a summarised textbook, I used CGP books, and doing a page every half an hour means it’s easy to get through a whole topic.

2. It’s okay to have two hour lunch breaks.  Your culinary skills come out during revision, and you know it. Or maybe just the bigger the meal the better. Beans on toast with grated cheese, one of my personal favourites. Set a realistic time to start work again after lunch, whether that’s after watching a romantic comedy or ten minutes after you finished before. But what ever you do, even if you have to crawl to your desk… STICK TO YOUR TIME.

3. Don’t listen to everything you hear. ‘I haven’t revised a single thing’…yeah yeah yeah, sure. Everybody says it, so when they get the results the can say ‘would you look at that, I’m naturally clever’! Don’t buy into it. The Internet and media shout about how stressed we should be, how we eat nothing but rubbish, and we’re all on set to fail. Sorry to enquire, but how would you know? It’s not like their 50 year old butts are working as hard as ours.

4. They are not a big deal. Yeah, they may dictate where we go to college, and possibly Uni…but come on. We’re aliens living on a planet in the middle of a solar system, the education system is invented by humans, for humans. If the apocalypse occurs, you’re not going to be saved because you got an A in GCSE maths. I see why you want to do well, so do I, but in the great scheme of things…they are not worthy of your stress.

5. The summer will be pretty awesome. No matter who you are, or what you enjoy, the feeling of having nothing to do is good. Very good. I still have a feeling in the back of my mind I should be doing something…but oh wait… there’s nothing. I’m scared I’m going to actually miss doing revision. I plan to go to the seaside, spend time with my boyfriend and maybe even write a blog post or two.